Top 10 Worst Eminem Songs

In my opinion, Eminem is by far the greatest rapper to ever live. I’m just going to say that flat out. If you disagree with that, okay. Makes no difference to me.

But nobody is perfect. While 99% of Eminem’s songs are good to incredible, he has slipped up a few times over the years. So I thought it would be fun to compile a top 10 list putting a spot light on his 10 worst songs (in my opinion).

 

-Okay, it was actually hard to find 10 bad songs, so I have to stretch it a little bit.

#10

“On Fire”- Recovery, 2010

This song isn’t bad at all. I actually like it. I just don’t really like the chorus that much, and compared to the rest of Recovery, this song jumps out as the worse by far.

#9

“Jimmy Crack Corn”- The Re-Up, 2006

Again, this isn’t a bad song whatsoever, I just don’t love the rhythm he raps with in the first verse, even though it is reminiscent of the actual Jimmy Crack Corn song. And it has 50 Cent on it, and I absolutely hate him, so that doesn’t help. The chorus is a tad annoying too, but nothing that really hurts the song.

#8

“Yellow Brick Road”- Encore, 2004

Yet again, this isn’t a bad song. It’s just kind of boring. He tells a story about his origins at a slow pace with an unexciting beat under it. This is all fine, it’s not one of his best, and again, it was hard to find actual bad songs.

#7

“Maxine”- Infinite, 1996

I expect you’re tired of hearing this, but this is not a bad song either. The issue is that half the song is a phone call with Maxine, who is a prostitute basically, and you can barely hear anything she says. And I guess just rapping about a whore isn’t great source material to me. But yeah, it’s still a decent song.

#6

“Ass Like That”- Encore, 2004

This song isn’t horrible either, it’s just okay. And weird. It has some indian beat, and he raps with a slight indian accent or something. The lyrics are kind of all over the place as well.

#5

“Untouchable”- Revival, 2017

This song borders on being bad. It just has not a lot going for it. I don’t really like the beat, the chorus is maybe okay. But the main body just sounds messy at times, especially at the end of the song. It’s also weird that he talks in the perspective of a black guy, which makes it difficult to take the song seriously.

#4

“Nice Guy”- Kamikaze, 2018

I don’t know what he was thinking with this song. The song features Jessie Reyez more than Eminem, and she has the worst voice I’ve ever heard. It is scratching on a chalk board in human form. She is a terrible person and should never sing again.

But anywho, it’s a very short song, and half of it seems to be intentionally weird and bad, which makes it almost forgivable. It’s pretty obvious they didn’t take the song seriously or put a whole lot of effort into. So basically, they should have just cut it, cuz intentionally bad is still bad.

 

 

#3

“Mosh”- Encore, 2004

This has a slow, marching beat to it. So like Yellow Brick Road, this is a very boring song. And Em gets all political, complaining about war and whatever, which doesn’t really suit him. On top of that, the song isn’t catchy at all, there isn’t any great rhymes. It’s just…ugh…

These next two…these are really the only two songs I can truly say are absolute terrible.

#2

“Rain Man”- Encore, 2004

What was he thinking with this one? This song is just stupid. It’s like he wrote half a song, went into the booth and just muttered a bunch of stuff in between to make a full song. It’s just 5 minutes of bad. But it does have one of his most offensive lines of all time in it, which is both hilarious and really mean.

#1

“Big Weenie”- Encore, 2004

This song makes Rain Man look good. That’s how bad it is. I have no idea what he was trying to accomplish with this one. It has no purpose, there is no message. He just says random things,  the rhymes aren’t great, the beat is slow and boring. There’s nothing redeeming about this song at all.

There you have it. I probably would have been better off doing a top 5 worst songs, since I like most of the ones on this list, but oh well. 5-10 bad songs over a 20+ year career is a pretty good record, I’d say.

 

 

My Top Ten Wii Games

I did not realize how many good games are on this console until I looked at everything I have.

Ahh…the good ol’ Wii. Terrible name, but man did it get people excited. It took me over a year to actually get one for it was selling like crazy. But anywho, when I finally did manage to get my hands on one, I have been building up a library that now consists of 69 games…though I have only played 59, so actually not too bad compared to most of my other systems. There are a lot of games I want to put on this list, but these are the 10 I came up with.

 

#10

Resident Evil 4: Wii Edition

re4 wii

Capcom, 2007

 

I played the crap out of the Gamecube game, so when an improved version came out, I was all over it. Still a great game. The motion controls made it so much more satisfying as well.

#9

New Super Mario Bros Wii

nsmbwii

Nintendo, 2009

 

While still not nearly as good as SMB 3 or World, this is an excellent platformer that is way better than the first in the “new” series.

 

#8

Kirby’s Return to Dreamland

Kirbys_return_to_dreamland_boxart

HAL Labs/ Nintendo, 2011

Kirby was hit or miss for me, I really only liked the old game boy games for the most part. Just as I thought they were done making good games for the series, I bought this and was completely blown away. I believe this to be my favorite game in the series.

 

#7

Mario Kart Wii

mario kart wii

Nintendo, 2008

I have always loved Mario Kart, but none as much as this. I played the fudge out of this game. I did everything you could possibly do in it and I got really stinking good at it. Alas, I haven’t played it in years and am terrible now…

 

#6

Xenoblade Chronicles

xenoblade

Monolith Soft/ Nintendo, 2012

I had never heard of the Xeno series before this. I thought it looked cool and then suddenly it became super rare and prices online were enormous. I happened to come across it at a GameStop in the middle of nowhere and bought it for the heck of it.

I was blown away. When I thought I was 10 hours in, I was 30. I beat it in 67 hours which felt like maybe 25-30 hours. I just got lost in the story, characters, environments and gameplay. Absolutely superb game.

 

#5

Metroid Prime 3: Corruption

reply_card [Converted]

Retro Studios/ Nintendo, 2007

 

This game is phenomenal. The Wii controls make you really feel like you are in Samus’ armor. Great environments, new items and cool boss fights make this one to remember.

 

#4

The Legend of Zelda: Skyward Sword

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Nintendo, 2011

 

As shown in my series ranked of Zelda games, this is my favorite game in the series (of the ones I have played). Once you mastered the motion controls, the gameplay was quite satisfying. I liked the setting and story of the game quite a bit as well.

 

#3

Super Mario Galaxy 2

Wii_Titlesheet

Nintendo, 2010

What a magnificent game. So creative and fun. This was a big surprise when they announced it. The fact that they make a sequel just to throw in all the ideas they couldn’t fit into the first game is just awesome. This leads us to #2…

 

#2

Super Mario Galaxy

SuperMarioGalaxy

Nintendo, 2007

This game is better than the 2nd only because it was a brand new idea and was just insane fun from beginning to end. I literally could not stop playing it. I got all stars for Mario and then immediately did the same for Luigi, which 100% games is something I never take the time to do, especially back to back like that. I just love this game so much.

 

And my favorite game for the Nintendo Wii is…

 

#1

Super Smash Bros. Brawl

smash brawl

Game Arts/ Nintendo, 2008

 

I love this series ridiculously. This is actually the first game I ever preordered. I got to a mall 2 hours before it opened just to be first in line to get the game too…which was a little silly, but whatever. I took it home and have not stopped playing it since. This is the first game in the series that really showed us what the franchise could be. Tons of different modes, crazy stages that you had to watch out for just as much as the characters you are fighting…and a huge roster of said characters and stages. A full blown single player campaign, which stunk but still…and to top it off it gave me nearly all of my most wanted characters at the time.

 

 

My Top 10 GameCube Games

GameCube is my favorite console of all time at the moment. It hads a diverse, fantastic library of games, some new adaptive abilities with the GBA, and the most comfortable controller ever made. But it’s really all about the games, so let’s see the 10 best in my opinion. It was hard to narrow it down, for of the 39 games I have gotten around to playing out of the 46 I own for the system, they were pretty much all phenomenal.

#10

Super_Mario_SunshineSuper Mario Sunshine

Nintendo

2002

 

This took the Mario franchise into a whole new territory, and I’ve got to say, it is quite creative and unique, making it fun to play at anytime. Shooting stuff with a waterpack while performing amazingly acrobatic jumps is just so much fun.

#9

Star_Fox_Adventures_GCN_Game_BoxStar Fox Adventures

Rare Ltd./ Nintendo

2002

 

 

This is another complete twist of a massive Nintendo franchise, and by far my favorite in the Star Fox series. It resembles more of a Zelda game, with some space battles. But finding items, solving puzzles and beating the heck out of dinosaurs is super fun whether you play as Link or Fox, or really anyone else for that matter.

#8

wwThe Legend of Zelda: The Wind Waker

Nintendo

2003

 

Turns out Zelda still does the genre better than Star Fox. But nevertheless, this game took a unique twist as well on it’s franchise, though not as much as the #9 & 10 spots. Using a gorgeous, new graphic style, flooding the kingdom we’ve saved countless times and introducing an interesting new story of sorts, this was one gripping game, though it does have a few rather annoying flaws. But even so, this is one great game.

#7

super_smash_bros_melee_box_artSuper Smash Bros. Melee

HAL Labs/ Nintendo

2001

Hoo boy, I easily put 1000 hours into this game with my friends and family. This took everything amazing about the first game and doubled it. There are so many modes to play, double the characters and probably even more stages. The most fun part was trying to unlock all the characters and stages. But once you did, it was nothing but 4 on 4 all out melee, and it never gets old. It doesn’t hold up all that well today, but that doesn’t stop me from going back to it every so often.

#6

Metroidprime2echoes

Metroid Prime 2: Echoes

Retro Studios/ Nintendo

2004

 

 

This dark and atmospheric game differed quite a bit from it’s prequel, and really, from the rest of the Metroid franchise. It is slightly more story driven and is the first game to feature a whole bunch of new items for Samus to acquire. The deadly double sided world is also very different and cool. Great game.

#5

Sonic_adv_2_battle_box

Sonic Adventure 2 Battle

Sonic Team/ Sega

2002

 

 

This is another game that I put more hours than I care to know in. Thanks to the addicting Chao Gardens, and the incredibly fun and diverse/cleverly designed missions, with special medals to earn in each one, the replay value in this game is enormous. After probably well over 100 hours or so, I still have so much left to do in the game. Though it has been a while since I played it. (Pesky backlog).

#4

viewtiful_joe_p_cdj0m7Viewtiful Joe

Clover Studio/ Capcom

2003

 

 

This is another from out of nowhere classic. Completely unique gameplay mixed into an equally unique and bizarre storyline, with a bunch of unlockables makes this challenging game just truly wonderful. The humor is great as well. One of my favorite games of all time.

#3

twilight-princessThe Legend of Zelda: Twilight Princess

Nintendo

2006

 

One of the last games to come out for GameCube was one of it’s best, and one of the best in the Zelda series. The gloomy graphical style fit the atmosphere of the game so well. A darker, interesting story with new characters and some brand new gameplay mechanics make this one to remember. This also has the best dungeons in the series as well, having deviated a bit from the usual formula.

#2

MetroidPrimeboxMetroid Prime

Retro Studios/ Nintendo

2002

 

 

2002 must have been the year for Nintendo to take their big franchises and flip them on their heads. Here is another drastic change to formula. An intense action side scroller became a dark, atmospheric first person shooter that was done so well, it feels to be a logical step in the direction of the series. This game is just perfect. The gameplay, the music, the level design, the enemy design, everything…just absolutely amazing. Easily one of the best games ever made.

And here we are, the best game to ever grace the GameCube!!!

#1

paper mario tydPaper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door

Intelligent Systems/ Nintendo

2004

 

 

This game is a master piece. Each area you visit is so unique and interesting, making it fun and exciting to explore. The gameplay is fantastic, using the same mechanics from the first game, but tweaked a bit. And what’s more, every single character in the game…I mean EVERY one, even the ones you just pass by, are so interesting and fun to watch or interact with. The large amount of party members and the special attacks are all so cool. The story is highly entertaining and fun to follow as well. It…it’s just so good. Like…I don’t know. It makes me feel like I am in the game, adventuring with Mario in all his papery glory. It is one of the few games where I became legitimately sad when I reached the half way point to beating it, but felt completely and wholly satisfied when I beat it, though I could just restart the game over and over again after beating it, it’s that much fun. But luckily, there is some challenging end game stuff to do to keep me preoccupied.

Great game…sniff.

So there you have it, the 10 best games on a console full of even more. Each one of these games filled me with a joyful spirit that I will carry with me forever.

Tournament Of Hotties: Disney Princesses (Round 1, Part 1)

I’m back with another tournament of gorgeous women, but this time we’re gonna feed our fictional fantasies. These princesses might be popular for being royalty and starring in big movies and the like, but they are also hot, and damn it, we want to know who the hottest of the hot are.

I am going to be going all out and using all sorts of Disney females of royal caliber, even a few I have never heard of before. Note that no matter what we see on these pages, I will be judging them on how they look in their respective movies.

So let’s get to it!!

Snow White VS Cinderella

Our oldest Disney princess is Snow White, but she doesn’t look a day over 20. She also isn’t much in the looks department at all. Her dress is unflattering, she’s kind of a ditz, and honestly, there isn’t anything to gawk at. But according to the Magic Mirror, she is the most beautiful woman in all the lands. Well, if that is true, then I’d hate to see the other women in whatever lands she is from.cinderella_eu_princess_pi_storybook_r_8e1944df

Cinderella, on the other hand, is a hot blond, though she doesn’t wear anything sexy, unless you are into rags.

She is obviously a very beautiful woman with a bangin’ bod. And as a bonus, she cooks, cleans and can talk to animals, so who wouldn’t want that in a woman?

So the winner here is obvious, but I would like to share with you a picture I have located that someone drew that does in fact, make Snow White look quite sexy.

Snow White Bra and skirt

Too bad you don’t shape up like that in the movie.

Victor-Cinderella

cinderella

 

 

Next up is a heavy sleeper and an avid swimmer!

Aurora VS Ariel

Aurora is an attractive blond, with her wild hair, petite body and shy nature, she’s enough to make any guy chase after her. The title of her movie even calls her hot…sort of. Heck, in Kingdom Hearts: Birth By Sleep, one of the characters you play as wants to bang the sleeping broad.

 

sleeping-beauty-disneyscreencaps-com-1992
I mean, look at that look. You couldn’t say no to that. She’s a sly fox, she is.

 

Sleeping-beauty-disneyscreencaps.com-4287
And I’m sure you can figure out something to do with her in this picture.

 

And next we have the gorgeous little mermaid, princess of the seas, Ariel! Sure, she’s half marlin, but that doesn’t mean her human half isn’t one of the hottest sights on the seven seas!

Any woman, half a fish or not, that wears a bra made out of sea shells as their everyday clothing, showing off their perfect body, is a welcome sight to me.

ariel wave
The waves here are an accurate portrayal of an inevitable explosion that would occur from a dripping wet, near naked woman with her mouth wide open, kneeling down on a rock and looking at you.

And when that long red hair is floating around underwater, phew, it gets pretty bubbly, if you know what I mean.

And with two beautiful women this time around, who to vote for?

Ariel takes the trout. Aurora has a great body no doubt, but she doesn’t flaunt it. Ariel has no shame. She shows us what she’s got, and we like.

Victor-Ariel

ariel-little-mermaid-ariel_pisces-39985040-1148-760

 

Next up are two more amazingly drawn hotties.

Belle VS Jasmine

Here we have a gorgeous French bookworm facing off against a beautiful Arabian princess.

Belle is not born a princess, but is married into it the role as implied in Beauty and the Beast. Not only does Belle score a 10 out of 10 in both the looks and brains department, but also in personality. She is a kind and gentle, unbelievably caring woman, but also can be fierce and fearless. She must also be one kinky lady, because she wants Beast’s bulge something awful. They could really get into some crazy business behind those big bedroom doors. And we can’t blame Beast either. Belle is one sexy woman.

beauty_and_the_beast_2010_by_j_scott_campbell-d2z2pqg

While Belle is pretty much perfect, Jasmine will not stand idly by and let her be overrun.

jasmine 2

 

The Aladdin babe is simply gorgeous. That dark skin, those big brown eyes and big lips,  long, bouncy hair, and that amazing figure make your heart melt and some other things grow.

She has a very tough personality. It’s like she’s a big tease. She exposes most of her upper body to you, but her aggressive attitude will keep you at bay unless you are a poor, heroic, homeless guy.

But she can also be very sexy, and she has such a perfect, seductive voice to go with it. Fortunately, she puts on this unbelievably sexy act multiple times in her series. Just everything about her is hot.

Did I mention how amazing her body is?

Little is left to the imagination on her fine hourglass figure, and really it looks like if her pants were real, they’d be totally see through. If you do manage to break down her defenses and score this perfect catch, you wouldn’t have to work hard in the slightest to undress her. One light tug and those pants and top are coming right off. Heck, if the desert she lives in wasn’t so dry, a gust of wind would probably get her naked, which is something we would all like to see.

So both of these contestants are beautiful, inside and out, and also have a darker, sexy and arousing side to them. So who is the better of such attributes?

Victor-Jasmine

Jasmine_Pose

Look for Part 2 of Round 1 coming soon!

Dear Developers-Linear Video Games ARE Still Fun

Aside from all the negative attention EA is receiving for their whole Star Wars Battlefront 2 mess, they have also recently been accused of shutting down Visceral Games and moving their Star Wars project to another company because of the linearity of the game. Whether this is true, I seriously doubt it, but they have been recently saying, among other developers, that one, people don’t like linear games as much, and two, consumers want to spend a very, very long time on each game.

I assure you, that I, and many people I know still love linear games. They are just as good as non-linear games, if not better. Admittedly, the world does seem to be so obsessed with “open world” styled games, but I personally don’t understand why. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I like them, but to have every game be like that is just ridiculous.

There is something to be said for games that just have you follow a path or two and not have to worry about where to go next or getting lost and all the joys that come with massive games.

To say you don’t like linear games is like saying you don’t like platformers, which is entirely possible if you were born in the last 15 years or so and are one of those people who think because the game doesn’t look and play realistically, it is crap. But should developers really be catering to that audience? Definitely not. They have no idea what a game can be or should be, they are just a bunch of dumb kids and should not be considered gamers.

gow gpThe God of War games are linear and they are some of the best games on their respective consoles. But I bet the new one coming out is going to be open world…oh boy! But this is excusable since it is a reboot, but imagine if God of War 3 was suddenly open world? It would be stupid. Those games are just intense action and it is fun. Many linear games are just as fun. Open world games are much slower moving and you spend an awful lot of time just walking around and looking for stuff. That is why many of them are over 100 hours long.

You could have just as much content in a game with a more condensed world and beat it in 30 hours. So is really adding extra walking time that much better?

Final Fantasy 13 is a game that gets much hate, and I’m pretty sure it is because of the Thundara_FFXIIIlinearity of the game. Big deal. It’s still fun. Just because there is no overworld to explore while constantly getting attacked by enemies trying to find the next town or a cave to explore to look for an item doesn’t make it a bad game. The true core is still there, and that is simply being an RPG set in a fantasy world.

And believe it or not, games don’t need DLC. Put extra effort in development and just pull the plug when it is released. Games typically are better when there is no DLC coming out 3 weeks after the game is released. Some DLC is nice, but most of it is just overpriced garbage that we don’t need. If companies actually did it right and didn’t just use it as a way to make some extra cash, then it would be actually pretty cool. But we live in a greedy, crappy world, so that will never happen.

And a lot of games now focus so much on online play, and how much they can cram into that, leaving single player modes very empty feeling. During the PS2/Xbox/GameCube era, I feel like games had much more girth to them. You got to unlock all sorts of stuff, play through a lengthy campaign that wasn’t obnoxiously long and have a great time doing it.

Now it feels like you get a slimmed down game so the devs can put more effort into the multiplayer, then instead of unlocking things, you have to purchase it later so you can pay the devs to continue to support the online aspects of the game.

Trouble with that is the majority of the gaming world still prefers playing by themselves. People suck. We have to spend all day with people. When we play games, we want to be left alone in a fake world void of other humans.

And really, if you have ever played multiplayer games with people, then you know they are a gathering of the biggest idiots on the planet. 10 year olds fighting with 30 year olds, people swearing in place of using actually grammar… it’s a mess. The gaming community certainly is one of the darker stains on the world, that is for sure. So why continue to go a route that supports such vulgar crap? Give us some solid stuff to play by ourselves. We are the majority of the market after all!

And this, ironically, brings me to the next thing developers have been saying. They claim people want to spend hundreds of hours on a single game. Gone are the days where people play a game and then move on.

This is not the case, I assure. I have a back log of over 300 games, so trust me, I don’t want to spend more than a reasonable amount of time on a game. And I assume that goes for anyone but those “gamers” who do nothing but play online Call of Duty and other online shooters. But I am not saying spending a long time on a game is a bad thing either…for it is not.

But this subject amuses me. Didn’t I just say that I wish they gave us longer single player experiences? Yes, well more valuable experiences, not necessarily longer anyhow.

But anyway, these devs are trying to keep us playing games by constantly coming out with new DLC to play. Trouble is, it’s not free and 99% of it isn’t worth buying. And again, this is really only appealing to people who play nothing but the online aspects.

cod2Speaking of Call of Duty, those games were phenomenal back in the day, when they were nothing but a single player campaign and maybe local multiplayer or whatever. The newer games are still fun, but they don’t come close to what they used to be, because all the effort goes into the online multiplayer.

So why do your original, loyal fans get shafted in favor of these people who like to do nothing but spend countless hours playing against each other? Why can’t they instead make exclusive online shooters, which fortunately seems to be a growing phenomenon, so they don’t in fact screw us single players over.

Another thing devs seem to be so worried about is replay value. How is this an issue if you are not letting us ever stop playing the game!?!?!? So they keep on adding more stuff that we can use on another playthrough and this and that, which is nice, but again, it costs a whole lot more money to do this, especially considering all of this DLC would have been included in the game 12 years ago! This is a big reason linear games are so seemingly unpopular. It is the same thing each play through…

And bottom line is, you really don’t need all this extra fluff in a game to make someone replay it. It could be the most linear game ever, but if the gameplay is fun, I am going to replay it for the sake of just having fun. I don’t need to play it for 200 hours, with new stuff added every 20 of those hours. If the gameplay isn’t all that great, it is going to be a dull, miserable 200 hours. I would much rather play a 5 hour game that is a whole lot of fun 10 times over. And big deal if I don’t replay it immediately. If it is 5 or 10 years down the line, then that means the devs did something right.

Trouble is, they won’t make extra money on it in the months following the games release, which is the whole issue here, so to their company, they did not do something right.

I’m all about trying something new, but don’t let the things from the past that actually worked be forgotten.

 

Nintendo Is About To Do To The Fighting Genre, What It Did To The Online Shooter

Back in May 2015, Nintendo released a game for the Wii U by the name of Splatoon. This is primarily a 4v4 online shooter, but instead of the main goal being to just kill as many people as possible, your objective is to paint, or “ink” rather, as much of the map as possible with the use of paint buckets, guns, paint brushes and rollers. There are a ton of weapons as well as gear, which boosts your abilities.

Image result for splatoon

The most unique part is your character can turn into a squid and move quickly through the cover of your own ink. Sounds pretty original, right? Well that’s because it is absolutely one of a kind. And it is easily the most fun online game I have ever played. I hate online shooters, I really do, but the moment I saw this, I couldn’t wait to play it, and I still play it all the time, two years later. It’s unique take on the genre, colorful art style and superb gameplay has really revolutionized the genre in a way.

Now here we are in 2017, the Switch has been released, and on June 16th, we are getting a brand new ip from Nintendo once again. Again it is for a genre I am not very fond of…fighting.

But Nintendo has given this genre their own bit of flair and have produced something that looks to be quite extraordinary, colorful, unique, content packed and extremely addicting. I of course am talking about Arms, the game where a bunch of unique and interesting characters with extendable arms beat the crap out of each other with a wide variety of…boxing glovish things called arms.

Needless to say, nothing has ever been done remotely close to this game, and it looks absolutely amazing. Again, a game in a genre I show little to no interest in has me barely able to contain my excitement! I am sure this is going to be the best fighting game ever, (in my opinion) just as Splatoon is my favorite shooter.

Nintendo just keep proving that they can take any genre, especially ones they really have never dabbled in before and produce something unexpected, unique, and most important of all, fun.

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But don’t take my word for it, especially since the game is not even out yet and I am really just making an awful lot of assumptions. But check out this Nintendo Direct. It will show you practically everything you need to know.

As a bonus, this summer Splatoon 2 is coming out, and that looks to do nothing but take the perfection of the first game and make it better. Be sure to check that out as well!

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