Tournament of Hotties: Bond Girls Round 1, Part 5

Here is the final part of Round 1. A record number of women have been shown in this round, and we are down to the last few. Check out the rest in parts 1, 2, 3, and 4. Now let’s get down to business.

 

 

 

Bout #25

Jinx Johnson (Die Another Day)

jinx johnson

 

VS

 

rosamund pike sexy

Miranda Frost (Die Another Day)

 

Okay…sigh…this is definitely the hardest match up yet. Both of these women are completely stunning.

Jinx kills it in that bikini, showing off her perfect body. (It is the incredibly gorgeous Halle Berry after all).

But Miranda looks just as jaw dropping, showing off a slightly more toned body. So what to do when faced with two perfect women and you can’t have both?

What’s worse is how both of them act so sexy and dress even sexier in their movies. This is quite a frustrating choice, but I think this one pulls out ahead.

 

 

Victor

Miranda-Frost

Miranda Frost (Die Another Day)

Sorry Jinx fans, Miranda’s just got better hair and on top of being hot and sexy, there is a cuteness to her that draws me a bit closer to her than Jinx.

 

Bout #26

 

vesper

Vesper Lynd (Casino Royale)

 

VS

 

strawberry

Strawberry Fields (Quantum of Solace)

 

This is another bout with 2 absolutely beautiful women.

Vesper’s job is to just look stunning in revealing dresses.

Strawberry has a smaller part, but acts very tough and sexy.

This is both a tough and easy decision.

 

Victor

vesper black dress

Vesper Lynd (Casino Royale)

 

Note that she probably only beats Strawberry for her consistently sexy attire. I just want to point this out just so as not to undermine how gorgeous and hot Strawberry Fields is.

 

 

Bout #27

 

Bond’s Lover (Skyfall)

bonds-lover

 

VS

severine skyfall-16598-1920x1080

Severine (Skyfall)

 

This is an easy one. Bond’s Lover is just some chick he was banging while the world thought he was dead. She’s in it for like 10 seconds and you barely see her. She’s mostly just getting shagged in the shadows. She doesn’t even look attractive from the picture above.

And then there’s Severine and well…yeah…

 

 

Victor

severine

Severine (Skyfall)

 

 

Bout #28

 

Lucia (Spectre)

lucia

 

VS

 

madeline spectre1

Madeleine (Spectre)

 

Both of these women are very beautiful, but not overly so.

If I remember, Lucia is a cheating whore and gets murdered for it, and Madeline is the hard to get lay. While both of them are sexy looking, there is a clear winner.

 

Victor

madeline

Madeleine (Spectre)

 

And there we have it! All the women that Bond has banged (by my count) have duked it out. Next up is Round 2!

 

 

 

Tournament of Hotties: Bond Girls Round 1, Part 1

James Bond is the reason STD’s exist. In the 24 movies he’s in, he’s banged a lot of women. He doesn’t even have to try usually. He just looks at them and they open up their legs. This gets a little ridiculous and almost comical at times. And if a woman turns him down, he just forces himself on her until she gives in, making for some rather uncomfortable scenes.

But anyway, we would all like to know if these chicks he’s doing are hot, and who are the hottest. It should be fun to flesh the women he’s done over the decades.

I will only be listing women he has done on camera or it’s been implied they had sex. Believe it or not, he still does a lot of sexual things with women but does not manage to go all the way for some reason. These girls shall not be included.

As I’ve said, he’s banged a lot of gals, so this is going to be the biggest tournament yet. And I have a feeling I missed a few girls, cuz there is so many it was getting hard to keep track.

But away we go!!!!

Bout #1

Sylvia Trench (Dr. No)

sylvia

 

VS

miss taro

Miss Taro (Dr. No)

Neither of these girls are particularly wowing, but they are attractive nonetheless. Trench looks great in the gorgeous red dress and Taro looks amazing glistening wet in a towel that just covers her tatas.

After some hard consideration, I think if Miss Taro dolled herself up in the way that Sylvia is, she would come out looking much better.

Victor

miss taro phone

Miss Taro (Dr. No)

 

Bout #2

 

Honey Ryder (Dr. No)

honey ryder

VS

vida

Vida (From Russia With Love)

Both of these women are stunning and scantily clad, but it’s almost unfair that one shows up in a wet bikini, her long, wet hair flowing down her back and front. Vida is absolutely beautiful and has great body, but the girl with the sexy name and body to match it takes the cake.

Victor

honey-ryder-wet-e1550406966555.jpg

Honey Ryder (Dr. No)

 

Bout #3

 

Zora (From Russia With Love)

Zora1

VS

tatiana from-russia-with-love-1963-8

Tatiana Romanova (From Russia With Love)

This is an easy one. Despite the fact that Zora has a super skimpy top, she just cannot compare to the glowering beauty that is Tatiana.

Victor

tatiana-romanova

Tatiana Romanova (From Russia With Love)

 

Bout #4

 

 

Jill Masterson (Goldfinger)

Jill Masterson

VS

PussyGalore[1]

Pussy Galore (Goldfinger)

Both women are attractive and both times they get banged is ridiculous. Bond breaks into Jill’s apartment to spy on Goldfinger and runs into her sun bathing on her balcony. Her first instinct is to F him. Whatever. She’s hot and has an amazing body.

Pussy, Bond pretty much rapes and it’s kind of weird, especially since they are in a barn. She’s hot too though and looks great with her shirt unbuttoned like that.

It’s a tough call, but this one seems to glow a bit more with radiant beauty.

Victor

jill masterson 2

Jill Masterson (Goldfinger)

 

Bout #5

Patricia Fearing (Thunderball)

patricia

VS

fiona

Fiona Volpe (Thunderball)

Both of these women are very beautiful, especially since they both appear to be on the slightly older side.

But if one must move on, Fiona takes it. Her large breasts, beautiful face and hair are just too irresistible.

Victor

fiona bath

Fiona Volpe (Thunderball)

 

Bout #6

Domino (Thunderball)

domino

VS

aki

Aki (You Only Live Twice)

It’s really hard to find good pictures when they all come from movies, cuz so far I feel none of them have done them justice. But you don’t need great pics to realize how hot these two are. This is probably the toughest match in part 1 so far. Both of these women are stunning, but the bikini shot reveals a truly amazing body.

Victor

domino 2

Domino (Thunderball)

 

Well that’s 12 girls down. There are tons more to come! See you there!

Tournament Of Hotties: Pop Singers-Round 1, Part 1

Pop blew up pretty spectacularly in the late 90’s/early 2000’s, which honestly is probably the last time I paid any attention to the genre…yeah either 2000 or 2001 I think.

The music itself was meh…but the great thing about pop singers, (besides their voices I suppose), and particularly the female ones, is that they tend to have amazing bodies, and tend to constantly showcase these bodies, so even if you hate the music, you will always be drawn to it because of these gorgeous babes flaunting what they got.

I’m not going to lie, I really had a hard time finding 16 contestants, for I haven’t followed really anything pop for nearly 20 years, so I’m not entirely sure if some of these gals even call themselves “pop singers,” but who cares, as long as they are hot, right? So without further ado, let’s get on to the first bout. Note that this has nothing to do with how they look now, but at some point in their lives, cuz you can never forget truly great hotness, am I right?

Janet Jackson Vs Mariah Carey

Hoo boy, hotties right out of the gate.

Starting with Janet, her flawless body is only made better by her unbelievably sexy abs…

Dang is she hot. She literally has one of the best bodies I’ve ever seen. The only trouble is she looks a bit too much like her brother, but let’s be honest, your looking at anything but her face anyway.

Mariah is a real treat. She’s been around forever, and despite time being against her, she still manages to make my jaw drop.

Here’s some younger pics of her…

Wow, what a hottie.

And now some of her more recently…

Simply breathtaking. While she was without a doubt better looking when she was younger, she’s still got it in all the right places, far more so than she used to. Plus her smile is adorable.

So which of these seasoned pop artists is hotter?

While, Janet has the better body by far, there’s something about Mariah that is both hot, cute, and sexy all rolled into one, and that’s big…big points…like her boobs…

Victor- Mariah Carey

Mariah Carey 03

 

 

Shakira VS Aaliyah

And we are hit with another couple of unbelievably hot women.

Shakira…ooh, it just makes me shake thinking about her. When I was a lad, I saw her on the TV live, and I fell in love. This girl had the best body, the sexiest voice and the most gorgeous…everything…I had ever seen up to that point. She was the first woman I ever saw belly dance and it right away become my favorite dance ever. She moved like an angel of sex, and still does, I might add.

It’s really hard to even listen to her sing when you are distracted by all the perfection she is blasting at you.

These are her at varying ages, but the most consistent part about her is she is consistently gorgeous…like dang…

And then we have Aaliyah…I fell in love with her when I saw Queen of the Damned. She just walked around as the half naked, unbelievably sexy and scary, which somehow made her more sexy, vampire, and I could not get over her long, thin, scorching hot body. There was no flaw on her at all. But don’t take my word for it…here!

aaliyah queen of the damned.jpg

So which of these hotties who successfully demonstrate what a beautiful woman looks like is hotter?

 

I have really no idea. They are both so stinking hot it is near impossible to decide. Aaliyah just squeaks out with the better body. Shakira sometimes doesn’t look all that attractive, and other times looks like the hottest woman in the world.

Hah…I really can’t decide. They are both so hot.

Okay, here’s the test. Whichever is hotter in the next two pictures wins.

Crap. Still can’t decide. It doesn’t help that Shakira is naked.

Okay, okay, I think I’ve got it now…

Victor-Aaliyah

aaliyah sheer

Well, we’ve got our first two victors! Look out for part 2 coming soon!

Tournament of Hotties: Impossibly Hot Women, Final

We have the two finalists battling it out here! See how they made it this far with the links posted here.

I’ve already explained to death how impossibly hot they are, so let’s just see some pics.

 

 

Megan Fox

VS

Sara Jean Underwood

Let’s have a little fashion show. Let’s see what these beauties look like in lingerie!!

 

 

 

 

Wow, those are some hot ladies!

What about bikinis…those are always hot, right?

 

 

 

 

Meowsa!!!

What about costumes?

 

 

Those are painted on! Makes you wish she played Wonder Woman in the recent film. She seems not to be a big fan of dress up unfortunately, because we would all love to see her in some more outfits.

Sara definitely is, even into some cosplay. So she will have a few more pictures.

 

 

There is nothing sexier than a woman who likes to dress up, though dressing down might be more accurate.

And just because, here’s just a few more hot pictures of our finalists.

 

 

 

 

Okay, now the big decision…who is hotter?

This is really, really hard to choose. These are honestly the two hottest women on the planet, and each wants to be number 1.

But I have to give the winning spot to her.

Victor

 

 

Sara Jean Underwood!!!!!!

While both girls are perfect in every way, Sara’s got a more tone body, sexy blond hair, and always looks so diverse in her pictures, which somehow gives her this sweet and sexy personality, which if you are hot and a sweetheart, you’re golden. I suppose the endless amount of photos of her doesn’t hurt either.

Bottom line, she is the hottest person I have ever laid eyes on, or at least through a computer screen. I will never lay real eyes on her… So congratulations Sara on being named hottest woman on the planet!

And like always, I like to rank all the contestants in my own personal opinion, from least hottest to hottest. Though regardless of how well they did in the tournament or in my personal ranking, these 16 women are, as far as I know and/or am concerned, the hottest women on Earth. Ranking them will probably be harder than the one on one matches. Oh boy…

Anyway here they are, from least impossibly hot, to most impossibly hot. The round in parentheses is how far they made it in the tournament.

 

#16

Kristen Stewart (Round 1)

Kristen Stewart Red Dress Side

 

#15

Brooklyn Decker (Round 1)

brooklyn decker rope

#14

Kendall Jenner (Round 1)

kendall_jenner_bikini_topshop_swimwear6.jpg

#13

Elizabeth Hurley (Round 2)

elizabeth hurley topless.jpg

#12

Katie Cassidy (Round 1)

Katie Cassidy sidewalk.jpg

#11

Kim Kardashian (Round 2)

Kim Kardashian White Bikini.jpg

#10

Scarlett Johansson (Round 1)

Scarlett Johanson Jock.jpg

#9

Jessica Alba (Round 2)

jessica_alba_04.jpg

#8

Tara Reid (Round 1)

tara-reid-sexy-boobs-07.jpg

#7

Denise Richards (Round 1)

denise_richards_naked-4.jpg

#6

Ciara Hanna (Round 1)

Ciara Hanna wants you

#5

Angelina Jolie (Round 2)

angelina-jolie-sexy-dress-large-crop.jpg

#4

Joanie Brosas (Semi-finalist)

joanie brosas naked.jpg

#3

Alexandria DeBerry (Semi-finalist)

allie berry tan

#2

Megan Fox (Runner Up)

megan-fox-wallpaper-10

#1

Sara Jean Underwood (Winner)

Sara-Jean-Underwood-768x1024

I almost feel bad ranking them, because again, they are all so very, impossibly hot. All these women should be worshiped.

Well that’s another tournament over. Thanks for checking it out, or rather, checking out the contestants. Till next time!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Tournament Of Hotties: Impossibly Hot Women, Round 3 (Semi-Finals)

Alright! We narrowed it down to the last four hotties! These gorgeous gals will battle it out to see which two will make it to the finals!

Check out the links here to catch up on all the hottie action in rounds 1 and 2, and then please, enjoy the upcoming hotties!

 

Megan Fox

VS

Joanie Brosas

I’ve already talked about how amazingly beautiful and perfect and sexy Megan Fox is. No matter what she’s wearing, or not wearing, she is just so, so beautiful. She took down Tara Reid and Jessica Alba in this tournament so far. When will her rampage end? Let’s take a look and see if that end is in sight.

 

A woman who looks like this is definitely going to be tough to beat. As I just said, no matter what she’s in, she’s gorgeous.

I mean, in this picture I’m about to show you, she is in hardly anything revealing, and it’s barely more than a picture of her face.

მეგან ფოქსი

It’s such an innocent picture and yet my jaw drops to the floor as if she was standing naked in front of me. She’s beautiful, plain and simple.

And to compete with her is the slender, sexy cosplayer Joanie Brosas, whose taken down Katie Cassidy and Angelina Jolie so far. This girl has an amazing body that easily takes the cake over Megan Fox’s body. And the fact that Megan’s is already completely perfect, that is a mighty impressive thing to say.

And speaking of Megan, I think she is the reason I discovered Joanie, now that I think about it. I was reading an article that was talking about Megan Fox being considered to play Lara Croft for a Tomb Raider reboot movie years ago. There was a picture of this.

Megan Fox Tomb Raider cosplay

It’s a hot photo, for sure, but this picture somehow led me to these…

 

 

And thus I discovered potentially the greatest body of all time. I mean just look at that. It completely blows away what Megan Fox looks like in her outfit. I”m sure you want more evidence to back up the whole “greatest body claim,” so here it is.

 

There are no words to describe her body. Like jeez, it’s (insert description here). Perfect is an understatement.

I mean, look at these pictures.

 

That other girl is no pushover. In other words, she’s hot. But when standing next to Joanie, she almost appears ugly. So I suppose the real question is, does Megan Fox appear ugly next to Joanie?

The answer…No.

Megan is still gorgeous. The hard part is deciding which of these women is actually hotter. We’ve already established Joanie has the better body, so that’s big points.

The woman that will move on is just barely hotter than her competition. There is something just more sexy about her. It’s like she is a goddess or something, but seems so real as well, if that makes any sense. You get lost in her looks, and it makes you feel warm and fuzzy inside.

Victor

megan fox wall

Megan Fox

You see? There is just something so real about her? It’s hard to explain, much like her beauty. Whatever she’s got, Joanie is lacking in it.

Next up are quite literally the two hottest blondes on the planet.

 

 

 

Sara Jean Underwood

VS

Alexandria DeBerry

Sara has beat out Ciara Hanna and Elizabeth Hurley, two of the finest woman in two different generations. But does the PlayBoy model have what it takes to compete with the gorgeous Alexandria? Maybe these pictures can help shed some light…

 

Good lordie, what a body! There isn’t a flaw on this woman. She is so toned, so hot, so sexy, so perfect.

Next is Allie, who can impressively say she has taken down Kim Kardashian and Kendall Jenner. Her body is literally an hourglass shape and it’s amazing. Here, see for yourselves!

 

 

Everything about her is amazing! EVERYTHING! Just look at her. She is not of this world. She is too perfect. Her butt…wow…her boobs…nice! Her long flowing hair. Her tight, toned body. Those lips, that adorable face. Regardless of how much is covered or revealed on that flawless figure, she can take your breath away.

So which of these two blond beauties is hotter? This is a very tough decision, but I think this one is.

Victor

sara jean underwood purple lingerie 2

Sara Jean Underwood

Megan Fox will join Sara in the finals.

But I have to say this about Joanie and Allie. Those two girls are so hot, so perfect, so beautiful in every way, that they almost seem manufactured, like they are robots or something. Sara and Megan beat them for they feel more real, more relatable, and have distinctive sexy auras about them. It’s easier to wrap your head around those two.

So I guess you could say Joanie and Allie lost for being too hot, which doesn’t make sense in a Tournament of Hotties, but that’s the way it goes.

See you next time for the final round of the Impossibly Hot Women tournament!