Shadow of the Colossus Is Colossal Crap

I just played the Ico/Shadow of the Colossus pack for PS3. And I really don’t understand why either of these games are “critically acclaimed”, even for back when they first came out.

icoIco was decent. I don’t love puzzle games, though, but it’s still a good enough game that it kept me entertained enough to finish it without hating it for the most part.

Shadow of the Colossus, on the other hand, lost me in an hour.

Shadow-of-the-Colossus-PS3

I don’t really like quitting games without finishing them, but I have no drive to do so with this one. I was put off with it right away. Thanks to long, slow moving, boring cut scenes, and abysmal control and camera, I hated the game before I even got to the first boss. 3 bosses later and I had enough completely.

Walking around a boring world with those awful controls was bad enough, but to fight the bosses is another test of patience entirely. Seriously, what is fun about climbing up the hair of a giant monster? This would be okay, but all you do is wait while the dumb thing tries to throw you off. Attack when it finally stops, which the windows are usually pretty short to do so, often times having your charged up attack interrupted by the swinging behemoths. So yeah, none of that sounds remotely fun…and it’s not. I don’t want to play games that make you wait while things endlessly shake. It’s crap and it’s boring and I don’t think a game has ever lost me so quickly. After the third boss, the thought of having to kill 13 more (I think) was unbearable, so I’m going to save myself the frustration.

If you like this game, (which apparently most of the world does) I envy you, but I just can’t get into it. This should change the name to “Shaking Colossal Monsters! Hang On!”

The fact that this game has been remastered twice is just baffling to me.

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